How association influences our choices – Three case studies from Ramayana

Krishna. Hi, Krishna. Thank you for coming today afternoon. And as mentioned, I’ll speak on the assos topic of association, how our association influences us, and how we can choose our association determinately. I’ll talk based on Ramayan.

I’ll talk about 3 characters who faced choices and how their association shaped their choices. So I’ll talk about we’ll compare Kaikai, Sugriyu, and Rawan. So what do we mean basically by association? At one level, it means physically the people around us. But that is not really association.

The essence of association is the transfer of desires. That means when we associate with someone, either they influence us or we influence them or we both influence each other. And what is their influence? In their association, our thoughts, our desires, our feelings, and then our intentions and ultimately our actions get reshaped. And sometimes this reshaping can be for good, sometimes it can be for bad.

So we all understand that the choices we make, they make us. The choices we make, make us. But how do we make those choices? Sometimes we may feel, oh, I just don’t have enough determination. That if I just had enough determination, then I would choose rightly.

It’s true we all could do with more determination, but sometimes determination is also a function of association. So we will talk about how some characters made wrong choices and how some corrected their wrong choices, some didn’t correct their wrong choices. It was all based on it is all based on association. So let’s begin with we’ll go chronologically, and then we’ll look at it. Chronologically in terms of how things happen in the Ramayana.

Most of you know the Ramayana? Mhmm. Okay. I was in one country, and I spoke about, lord Narasimha. And then there this was several years ago.

They said they said, we know Narasimha Rao. Now, of course, we don’t know Narasimha Rao also as a old travelist from India. They didn’t know what Narasimha Dev. They know Narasimha Rao they knew. So okay.

So now in the Ramayana, is one who is? Does anyone know? Darshida’s 3rd wife. Yeah. Darshida’s 3rd wife.

Now she, is his favorite queen. She’s youngest. She’s most beautiful. And, also, she’s not a bad person. When there’s the 3 cowives, does anyone know who are the 3 wives?

Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. So then, now, naturally, there was some tension between them, but they were all overall living cordially. At one particular time, see, for all of us, our character doesn’t really come out in our normal course of action.

Because normal course of action, it’s easy to be good. If somebody is behaving politely with us, we behave politely. But if somebody provokes us, then what do we do? It is when provoking or difficult situations come up, that’s when who we are at a deeper level comes out. At a surface level everybody can be like a gentleman and a lady but that’s provocations actually you could say introduce us to ourselves not necessarily to our entire self.

We can have a bright side and a dark side. But, the dark side that is there within us, which often we conceal, that comes out when we get provoked. So they were living quite happily but at a particular point there was a change. See if you are going on a road, if it’s a straight road how well we drive, okay, this is a straight road you are driving. But then when your turn comes, if it is a sharp turn, then how well you drive, that’s what is tested at that time.

So similarly, turn came in their life and that turn was no grains. No grains in this. No grains. Okay. Thank you.

So when a sharp turn came, that was there was a succession. Dasharat was the king. And then just like in a relay race, 1 person runs a particular distance and then they have a torch. They hand it over to the next person. So like the Dashrath was going to hand over the kingdom to a successor.

And whom did he choose? He chose his oldest son. That was Ram. And now that was in one sense expected, but somehow, Kaikeyi, because she was her favourite, Ram’s Das Dasher’s favourite queen, so it was thought or at least she had some idea that maybe my son will become the king. Sometimes when we get one privilege extra, we start thinking that we are entitled to extra privileges.

So she started thinking that, okay, although Kaushalaya was the senior most queen, but Darshal spent a lot more time with her and she got lot of prestige because of that. So she also started thinking that if I am getting this special position, my son should also get it. And it was not like a very deep rooted feeling within her, but that thought was always there. And within us, we may all have weakness. Weakness means when temptation comes, when provocation comes, at that time, we do something wrong.

So weakness is always there in all of us. But what happens? Wherever there is weakness, nearby lies wickedness. Now, wickedness means see, weakness means people do wrong things not because they are bad people but just because they don’t have the strength, moral strength to resist a bad choice. But wickedness is people who deliberately do bad things and not only they do bad things, they actually get joy in doing bad things.

Say for example, some student is in a college and, say may be there are lot of tension of exams, reason relationship issue and may be whatever things and this student feels weak, tempted. And maybe in that same university, there are some drug peddlers. Now the drug that student has weakness, and the drug peddler peddlers are have wickedness. So they make a business out of that. And then the student might get addicted.

And now the statistics are so alarming that one out of every 4 people in the world is addicted. Addicted either to alcohol, to drugs. Smoking is also serious, but alcoholism, drug addiction is quite serious. So similarly, here, Kaikeyi had weakness, but nearby, there was somebody who was waiting to grab that opportunity and exploit that. Who was that?

Manthara. Manthara. So in a Manthara, she was hunched back, and sometimes she was, targeted with some she was some taunted joke because of that. This is bad, but it is not like unbearable. But when she she was the favourite maid of the favourite queen of the king, so her position became elevated because of that and because of that position nobody could now taunt her and she thought if my queen loses this position then I will also lose this position.

If my queen loses her position then I will lose my position. I have to protect my privileged position at all costs. And Dharas, she poisoned Kaike’s mind. She said this is a whole conspiracy to deprive you of your kingdom to deprive your son of his kingdom. And once Ram becomes the king, Kaushalya, because she has been slighted by Dasharat for to favor you, she will get back at you.

And the way she will get back to you is, she will poison Ram’s mind. And Ram will have Bharat exiled to the forest or Ram may even rig up some charges, frame him and have him executed. Now none of this had any iota of reality to it. But once we want to believe something, it’s like our mind can come up with all kinds of crazy ideas and sometimes see we deceive others and that’s bad but sometimes we deceive ourselves into believing the false to be true So she spun this whole narrative and what happened? Kaike fell for it.

And once Kaike fell for it, slowly, slowly that poison went in and then she one, a few hours before something which she would not even have contemplated, she became firm about it, obstinate that you have to send Ram to the forest for 14 years and you have to make my son the king. And Dashrut, because he had given a word of honor earlier, he was bound. And Dashrut said, I am not able to live without Ram. So, at least, even if you want Bharat to be the king, that’s okay. But don’t send Ram away.

I can’t live without him. And how has Ram offended you? What what fault has he done to deserve this? But Kaikai had been grilled by Mantra. She had told Mantra, I told that if Ram is in the kingdom, Bharat will never accept the kingship.

Even if Bharat accepts, the citizens will not accept. The courtiers will not accept. So you have to send Ram out for a sufficient amount of time till Bharat gives a stable rule. And Kaushal Kaikeyi fell for it and when Ram went to the forest, only Ram went, Sita went. Now Sita was a princess, she was a tender princess, but she had to be a forest bark and she had to go to the forest and she just didn’t listen to anyone.

Vashishta tried to persuade him, Dashrut fell at his at her feet and begged her, please don’t do like this. But no one she listened to. Eventually in separation from Ram, Dasruta died. And the whole of Ayodhya sank into an ocean of lamentation because of that. Finally, when Laksh when Vishwami when Vashishta became like the emergency king because there was this king was dead and none of his sons were there.

Then he summoned Bharat back. Bharat and Chaturburn were not there at that time. And when Bharat came back, Ayodhya had become like a ghost town. And what happened? His father, normally his father would be there to welcome him, his father was not there, he went to his mother’s palace and his mother spun the whole story she said actually there was a big conspiracy to deprive you of your kingdom I have protected your rights And oh Bharat, the kingdom awaits you now.

I said, what do you mean? And then, he told the whole story. Now, Bharat was horrified. There was shock after shock after shock. First, he couldn’t believe that Ram has been exiled.

He couldn’t believe that Ashut has died. He couldn’t believe that his mother has caused all this, and he couldn’t at all believe that his mother thought that he would be happy because of all this. Oh, finally, he saw aghast. He said, you are not my mother. He said, you are the goddess of destruction incarnated into our family to destroy our whole dynasty now when Bharat spoke this see all along see, when we do something bad also, we we justify it to ourselves, some way or the other.

There’s an English word called rationalise. Do you know this word? Rationalise? Rationalise means to somehow to reason in a way that we make the false appear to be true. So rationalize, what is the spelling of rationalize?

R a. R a. R a n a. Yes. L I s e l I s e, s e or zed e depending on whether American or British, but rationalize, you can also spell it as r a t I o n a l l I e s, rational lies.

So when we rationalise, we tell rational lies. We tell lies that seem rational. So till now, Kaheke was telling herself that actually everybody is criticising me, but I am doing this all for Bharat. So she had created an imaginary Bharat who appreciated what she was doing. But when the real Bharat came over there, and then that imaginary Bharat and the real Bharat collided, And boom, the bubble of the imaginary Bharat disappeared.

And then she realized, what have I done? What have I done? How could I have caused the death of my husband? How could I have done all this? And then she came to her senses.

Unfortunately, by that time, the ball had already passed. You know, it had been too late. Although, she herself went with, Bharat to request Ram to come back and accept the kingship, but Ram didn’t. He said, my father has told me to go, I cannot come back now. So but here, at least, Kaike came back to her senses.

So we see what happened over here. She if you see Kaikeyi over here. Say, Mantra was over here. Among all the people around her, she let Mantra influence her the most. Mantra preyed on her weakness.

She was she had some tension. Okay. I m in a superior position. She had some insecurity, but maybe Kaushka Kaushka level take my position. So that that tension that was there, she exploited that.

And then what happened? Because of that, she didn’t hear anyone else. But at least when Bharat came back, she heard Bharat. Because she was very deeply invested in Bharat. She thought I am doing all this for Bharat.

So then when it was Bharat who brought her back to the senses, but by that time, it had become too late. So it was bad association that that misled her and good association at least helped her come back to her senses. She understood that I had done something wrong. But, of course, she couldn’t correct it because it was already too late. So here, as I said, I started by talking about how our choices are affected.

Our choices are done not just by our willpower or lack of willpower. All of us have weakness around us, within us rather. Some of us may get too angry, some of us might be too greedy, some of us might be too negative, whatever. Now we nobody is free from weakness. But around us, if there is anybody with wickedness and we don’t want to label people that you are a weaker person, not on their face like that.

But anybody who plays with our weakness, who manipulates us based on our weakness, then we have to guard ourselves from them. If we let ourselves be affected by them, then we can be misled. Things that we would normally not do, we will end up doing those things. Say, we all might have a desire. You know.

I want to no. We all want to grow. We want to grow socially in our relationships. We want to grow financially in our economic status. We want to grow in various ways.

But if somebody we all have that insecurity. Am I growing properly or not? But if somebody exploit that insecurity, and they make us greedy, and then they make us do something corrupt, something unethical, and then normally we would not do that. But somebody who makes who plays with our own fears and manipulate those fears can make us do things which we would normally not do. And to some extent, in today’s world, the advertisement industry is like that.

The advertisement industry, what does it do? It plays with our insecurities. It makes us feel if you don’t buy this product, oh, you’re not good enough. So in the past, advertisements were maybe 100 years ago, advertisements were about how good this product is, but today, most advertisements are about how good this product will make you feel. That means, if you don’t have this product, you’ll feel bad.

You get this product, you’ll feel good. So they play with their insecurities. So this is an example of weakness being misled by wickedness or being aggravated with goodness. Now, let’s go to the last example and then come back to the middle example. The last example is Rawan.

Now, Rawan himself, he was he didn’t just have weakness, he had wickedness. Now, he would deliberately it was not just like a moment of lust for him where he did something wrong. When he abducted Sita, it was a well planned conspiracy. See, weakness means that that is not the way we normally behave but sometimes circumstantially we do something wrong. But wickedness is very systematically planned.

Weakness is hot headed. Wickedness is cold blooded. So now, Rawa already had wickedness within him. That’s how we planned the whole thing to abduct Sita. But after that, Hanuman came to search for Sita.

And Hanuman gave a phenomenal exhibition of power. It was have you heard the words trail blazing? Has anyone heard the word trail blazing? Trail blazing means, you know, that somebody just goes on a new path and sets a trail over there. Somebody’s going in a car, the car goes so racing car goes so fast that that it’s it’s it’s blazes a trail over there.

So, Hanuman came to Lanka. It was not just trail blazing, but he was tail blazing. Now his tail was on fire, and with that tail, he set Lanka on fire. And while going, Anuman stood on the border wall of Lanka and he roared. He said, thousands of monkeys as powerful as me and more powerful than me will soon come and attack Lanka if Raavan doesn’t return Sita to Ram.

And with that he just jumped and he jumped the whole wall under the pressure of his jump crumbled. So it was a scary warning, and then, Ravan summoned an emergency council. So our Lanka has been attacked. What do we do? And then he said he he said, we thought that Lanka was impregnable, but it has not only been penetrated, half of it has been burnt.

What should we do now? Now, Rawan was surrounded by whom? Demons. And all those demons, now when you ask this question, there’s one person who gives some sane advice. Who was that?

Dheeshan. Dheeshan. Dheeshan told him that if one unarmed monkey caused so much damage and he already seen the power of Ram single handedly at Janasthani and killed 14,000 demons. So, you know, return Sita. You can save the whole of Lanka from destruction by that.

He got he got this good advice, but he also got bad advice. All the other demons, they said, Prastha, his commander said that, actually, this monkey, we would have killed him, but he caught us by surprise. Another demon said that, yes, if we had been prepared, he would not even be able to enter Lanka. He would have been killed before that. Let anybody else come, he will destroy all of them.

Other demon got up and he said, what to speak of waiting for them to come? Let us chase Hanuman now and go wherever he is and break revenge. Nobody who attacks Lanka should be allowed to go scot free. We’ll destroy all of them. We’ll not even let them reach here.

And like that, all the demons, they assured Ravana that there is no threat for him. In fact, those who had attacked him, it is they who were under threat. And Vibhishan said to, Ravan, those who speak what we want to hear are easy to find, but those who speak the truth are rare. He says, I speak only for your benefit. Their advice will lead you to destruction.

So then Indrajeet got up. Indrajeet said, oh, uncle, it seems that you work for our enemies not for us. Instead of inspiring our heroes, you are discouraging them. And he said he says, it seems you are not born you are not born an authentic demon family. You are a coward.

And normally to call anybody a coward is insulting, but in traditional societies, they’re very hierarchical. So we might speak something harsh to our equals or our juniors, but we don’t speak rudely to our elders. Somebody is our father or father figure at that time. So this was a grievous insult to publicly call Vibhishan a coward. And that too a junior, 1 generation younger calling him a coward.

And not only that, at that time, Ravind remained silent. The the harsh words of our critics hurt us. But more than the harshest words of our critics, more hurting than that is the silence of our friends. When we are criticising, nobody comes to defend us. That’s even more painful.

So when Ravan remained silent, Devisha decided, I cannot stay here. And he said, oh, Rawan, oh Indrajeet, because you have grievously insulted me, because you rejected my advice, I leave you. So here, what happened? Rawan opened the door to his own destruction by this. So, here, he had wickedness, he had good association, but he rejected it.

And he ne unlike Kaikeyi, Ravan never repented. Ravan never realized that I had done something wrong. So he, he himself was wicked and further he was surrounded by wicked association. And even when he got a wake up call, when he saw Hanuman’s phenomenal power and the devastation that he had caused, there was a wake up call for him. But even that wake up call didn’t wake him up.

Why is that? Because it’s possible to wake up a sleeping person. It’s impossible to wake up a person who is pretending to sleep. So similarly, he just blinded himself to everything that was contrary to the way he wanted things to be. And thus he courted his own destruction.

So this is also an example of the he was fortunate to have wise association with him even though he was a demon, but he rejected that association. And when he rejected that association, he invited, he courted his own destruction. The third case we will discuss is what happened in between, that is the case of Sugri, now Sugri, had because of a misunderstanding been exiled by his brother Vali And eventually, by Ram’s help, Sugri got the kingdom in Garak. And then the plan was that Sugri will help Ram to find Sita. But at that time, the chaturmas started, and heavy rains.

In fact, Indra said to be extremely angry at that time because Indra’s son, Wali, had been killed. So Indra showered unseasonal rains and normally, if say if our child is lost or something like that, we won’t just rains allow us stop stop us from searching for our child. So why did Ram stop just because of the rains to in searching for Sita? But at that time, the rains were such that you couldn’t even move. Well, not just rains but stormy rains, torrential rains.

So during that time, they decided that we’ll wait for the Chaturmasi to get over and then we will search for Sita. Now during this period, Vali had for a sorry, Sugriya for a long time had lived in the forest. And forest, although he was a monkey, he was actually royalty. Not just ordinary monkeys, he was a manara, and they had a prosperous kingdom. He had lived in the royal comforts and then he had been forced to live in forest austerity.

Now when suddenly he got all the royal comforts back, he started getting lost in sensuality, lost in revelry. And then the 4 months got over and still he forgot. He forgot that I had some obligation And and now for a king to provide enjoyment, there are many people. Because the king is wealthy, if they provide enjoyment to the king, the king will provide them wealth and other gifts. So he had that association, and he got lost in that.

And as 4 months were ending, the the associates and advisers of Sugri were becoming more and more concerned. And then Lakshman was sent by Ram. And seeing Lakshman coming, before that itself Hanuman anticipated that. Now for Hanuman, Sugri was his king. And that’s why Hanuman could give some gentle advice, but still he was aware of the hierarchy.

He couldn’t just warn me you’re doing something wrong. Then Hanuman thought what to do. Hanuman approached Tara. Tara had earlier been the queen of Vali. And then when Vali had died, Vali had told Tara to live in the shelter of Sugri.

So now Tara he told Tara, and then Tara came and told Sugri. And Sugri realized, hey. Okay. And Sugri came out of his, sort of, revelry, and he ordered. He he said that, let us go.

He ordered that wherever monkeys are there in various parts of the world, call all of them. Call all the monkey leaders, call and call all the monkeys and they we have a urgent mission. So he gave this instruction, but after that, again he went back to his palace, to his court and again he lost himself. See, awoke but again he went into a, you could say Maya, to illusion. But then after that, what happened?

Lakshman came, and Lakshman is known to get angry very quickly. And by this time, Lakshman was so angry. You see, if we love someone and if we see that they are in distress normally we want to do something to help them say, if if say, if we have a child and a child is sick now we don’t know what is the sickness and we want to help them and say we go to a doctor we go to a hospital. And the hospital the doctor, instead of attending to the child, the host doctor is busy watching a cricket match. Swad?

We’ll get angry, isn’t it? It’s understandable. So if we can’t help someone and those who can help are just enjoying themselves and not doing their duty, then we can get very angry with them. So similarly, for Lakshman, he he could see Ram was in such distress in separation from Sita and he couldn’t do anything. How do you find Sita?

And Sugriva could do it, but when he went sug he went to the royal palace, what did he see? He, Sugriva was watching movies on the Internet. The version of the Internet at that time. So basically, he was doing whether it’s Internet is there or not, whether movies are not there there or not, the important thing is essentially he was doing the same thing. He was just enjoying himself, watching dancing girls and stuff, and Lakshman got angry and he roared in anger.

So wretched monkey, ingratitude is the worst of all sins. Says one who forgets the favor that their friends have done to them deserve to be punished. Now when he spoke like this, his anger was so great Sugary was sitting and enjoying what happened? It’s like we are enjoying a movie and suddenly somebody roars at us. Hey, what happened?

And he realized he was Lakshman, and seeing Lakshman has anger, he became alarmed. And he didn’t even know what to speak at that time. But then Tara was wise. Tara came and says, oh, Lakshman. No.

Even the great sages fall prey to temptation. And Sugri was just a monkey. Now don’t be angry with him. No. After a long austerity, he got a fortune to enjoy, so he’s lost himself.

But he has not forgotten his duty. He has already ordered monkeys to come. And once those monkeys, have come, immediately, everybody will be sent to search for Sita. And then Lakshman became pacified. Then after this, Sugri never has any lapse.

Sugri purposefully, efficiently leads the monkeys. And when they find Sita, they go for regaining Sita on a rescue operation, which becomes a war. They even Ravan comes in, Ravan sends his messengers to tempt Sugriva. He says that, you know, you have no enmity with me. No.

You don’t get involved in this. I will I had an agreement with Wally, and we’ll continue that pact. And he gives him a lot of he gives him like a lot of gifts to allure him. But Sugriv is not allured at all at that time. So here, Sugriv has weakness and he succumbs to that weakness.

But before any real harm is done, what happens? The good association around him saves him. And then, it is not just good association that saves him, Once he gets engaged in a purposeful service, then even when some temptation comes, he is not tempted by that he is not distracted by that. So it is only when he was idle, he had nothing to do, and then there was the temptation. He completely fell for it.

It’s like, now if we have if we have work to do, we may not spend hours and hours surfing the net, watching movies, playing video games, or whatever. But if you have nothing to do, then what happens? WhatsApp. Then, yeah, WhatsApp, social media, Facebook, so many things come up. During our idle time, our mind works over time, and comes up with so many things to do.

And it’s our mind working over time, and with social media, there are 100 of minds working over time who all come together. So in our situation, it’s often like Sugareem that we all have responsibilities, we have material responsibilities, we have spiritual responsibilities, but if we place ourselves in tempting situations, we may get misled. We may get allured and misled. Now the world itself is a place of temptation, so we can’t avoid tempting situations entirely. But what we can do is we make sure that we have good association around this.

And that, like, just as, Sugri listened to that good association, and then he will say yoga. So similarly, we cannot avoid temptation, but we can make sure that we have good association with us. If we have good association, then even if somebody tries to fan our weakness, exploit our weakness and we start doing something wrong, the good association around us will warn us, hey, this not you should not be doing this. And that way, we will be protected. So, we cannot very easily change our mind internally.

The desire that are there, the inclination that are there, the habits that are there, we cannot suddenly remove all weaknesses from inside us. But, what we can more easily do is change our association. If we if we have the association that exploits the weakness, then if we are here, we will be dragged down. But if we have association that strengthens us, that warns us about our weaknesses, that inspires us to develop our strengths, then we may be here, but instead of going down, we will rise up. And the best association is not just that which tells us don’t do this and do this.

But the best association is that which inspires us to connect with the source of all goodness, the source of all virtue that is God Krishna. We all have strengths, we all have weaknesses. Now, if we connect with Krishna who is all pure, then by that connection both our strengths will become stronger and our weaknesses will become weaker. And then we will become better human beings. We’ll be able to better do our responsibilities.

We’ll be able to better pursue meaningful and fulfilling happiness. And thus, we can create a brighter future for ourselves as devotees of the Lord. And all this positivity can come in our life if we are careful about choosing our association. So I will summarize, and then we can have a few questions. So I spoke on the topic of choosing how our how we how choosing our association or how our association influences us.

We did 3 stories. So I started first by talking about, the choices we make make us and sometimes when we make we make wrong choices, we think that I lack determination. It could be true, but it could also be that, we have, we lack the right association to make the right choices. So we can’t suddenly develop determination, it takes time. But what we can do is wisely choose our association.

So I discussed 3 stories. What are the first incident? So made a terrible choice. So had what? Weakness.

And mantra had what? Wickedness. So we all have weakness, but if we listen to wickedness, then we end up doing wicked things. And if we can if we know that we have weakness, then we have to be careful to keep the wicked association away from us. Kaike was not a bad person, but she did a terrible thing because of bad association.

But at least, she did not completely cut herself cut herself away from everyone. That’s why when Bharat came back and Bharat spoke strongly to her, she came back to her senses. So that was weakness, being misled by wickedness, but then eventually coming back to goodness by a good association. But by then, it was it it was a mistake which is too late. The consequences were too many because she went too far.

She did not have anyone who she could listen to around her at that time. And that’s why her husband died, her, nephew went to the forest, and terrible things happened. Then I discussed about second story was? Ravana. Ravana.

Ravana and Vishan. Ravana and Vishan. He courted destruction. So even when he got a wake up call, he refused to wake up because his mind was rationalizing. Now we just see what we want to be what we want to see and neglect everything else.

So if somebody is at that wicked level, then for them to be saved is very difficult. And if they reject whatever good association little good association they have, then almost then there is no hope for them. And a third example was? Which who was that? Sugriva.

So he also had weakness, and after long austerity, when he suddenly got enjoyment, he lost himself. But the advantage he had was he had good association. And when he listened to that, when he listened to Tara, when he listened to Hanuman, and finally when he listened to Lakshman, and then not just listen to them one time, don’t do this and do this, but eventually, he got engaged in some constructive activity. Then even when weakness, temptation came, zerrawan came and tempted him, now send people to tempt him. He was not tempted.

So for us, we all have weaknesses, but to protect ourselves from those weaknesses, we can’t just expect one day I wake up and I have determination by which the weakness will go away. It will take time for the weakness to go away. But what we can do is carefully choose our association so that not we avoid the wickedness that will drag us down, we choose the goodness in the association around us that will that will raise us up. And the best association is that which connects us with the supreme good being God. When we connect with God through bhakti, then that strengthens our strengths and weakens our weaknesses, and thus, we can become the best that we can be.

Thank you very much. Hare Krishna. So any questions or comments? Please take opportunity because so many we have some old problem for prevention. Don’t be shy.

Every one of us is here to rectify ourselves and come close to Krishna. And even though something want to come close to Krishna, we don’t have opportunity to clarify with the right people with higher understanding. This opportunity, says, This when we hear from senior devotees, whole millions of lifetime, which they can rectify. Opportunity is there. Please take me.

I have to go, but I think you’re sure because we want to do time on it half an hour just for questions because we’re trying something else. But I like to all of you, because we’re serious people, please take a few questions with answers. Definitely, we must get some doubts, but don’t be shy. So how do we identify the weakness and strength actually? As a Ravana, he’s a strength.

He’s, he’s a power he has. So he’s he’s looking for the strength, and he’s looking the association related to that. So how we, as a normal human being, how we can identify our strength and weaknesses? Okay. The previous stupid question, but I’m just trying to Yeah.

Go beyond I understand what you’re saying. So how do we actually identify our strengths or weaknesses? So Ravana was a warrior, and for him, those who would view confidence in his fighting capacity, he could call them as his friends. And those who would take away their confidence, he would call them as his enemies. So, how do we choose in such a situation?

Strength and weakness is determined not just by how well we can do something, but rather how right something that we do is. That’s why we have a innate comp we we all have, like, a innate moral compass within us, a conscience. We call it viveka buddhi. Now in some people, it might be more act active, some people it might be less active. And it is not that everything that our conscience tells is always right.

Sometimes our conscience may also get like a compass in a magnetic field may get distorted. So like there are conscience can also get distorted at times. But basically we have a sense of right and wrong. And, we need to act according to listen we need to listen to that. And sometimes our model compass can get obscured, so then we need to also consult somebody whom we trust.

So it’s not there is there, we all have certain strengths in the sense that we can do certain things well. But are those the things that we should do at a particular time? That is also something to discuss. See, as a Kshatriya has to fight, but it is not that a Kshatriya is meant to fight for any and every cause. It is Kshatriya is meant to fight to protect dharma.

So kshatriyas, the very word kshatriya in Sanskrit means shatha trayate itik shatriya. Shatha is hurt. Trayate is to free from or protect from. To protect people from hurt. So in that sense, Kshatriya’s fighting is for protection, not for aggression.

It is primarily for protecting people. So clearly, Ravan’s act of abducting Sita, somebody who was the duly wedded wife of someone else, it was wrong. And, even he had an understanding that what he was doing was underhanded. That’s why he did not just confront Ram straight away. He created a whole conspiracy by which he sent Maricha as a deer, and then he tried to allure Sita.

And then when Sita was not allured, then he he forcibly took her. So he already knew what he was doing was wrong. So there, it’s we need to have that moral compass. Then our expertise in terms of we can have somebody can have fighting ability, somebody can have verbal ability, somebody can have, say, money making ability, but all these abilities, we have to use them in a virtuous direction. Kama can mean it can specifically mean lust, but generically, it means desire.

It can even mean ambition. So when does ambition become greedy? When ambition makes us go over ethical boundaries. So Krishna says have ambition, but ambition that is not against dharma. So ambition that is within the boundaries of dharma, Krishna says, that is not wrong.

That is that is fine. We all want to grow in our lives and we all will look for what strengths we have by which we can grow. But in growing, we have to make sure that we don’t cross the boundaries of that. That kind of growth, if we become obsessive about a particular thing and then you cross ethical boundaries, then that growth will be destructive. It’s like all of us say we’re just one cell in our mother’s womb at one time.

Now we are fully grown human beings with with millions of cells. How did this happen? By growth. So growth is natural. It’s desirable also.

However, cancer is also growth, but that is what? It’s a disproportionate growth and it’s destructive growth. So when one desire, so the desire for wealth becomes cancerous that means for gaining money, I forget everything else. I forget dharma, I for I forget my ethics. I forget my, sometimes, family responsibilities.

Everything else I forget, and then it becomes cancerous. So we have to have that sense of that moral compass, that sense of dharma, and then may use our strengths in a way that is consistent with dharma. Okay? Thank you. Can I ask more questions?

Yeah. Yes. Does anyone else have questions? Yeah. So you mentioned about the moral compass.

Right? So that’s Vivek and Virag. Yeah. That’s Vivek. Vivek.

Yeah. Yeah. So how do we what do we do as a normal human being to increase or get more, more Vivek, actually. So then we have more better path to understand the the weakness and the strength. So how do we because that’s something is like a thing because you guys sleep in That’s true.

In a in a audience. So how do we add more that or encourage to to get more, actually, basically do it and where are you? Yeah. Good question. So how do we, let’s say, sharpen our conscience?

Yes. Broadly, three things. 1st is action. That means, let’s say, there are certain things we all know are good, and there are certain things we all know are bad. There can be a gray zone.

Should I do this? Should I not do this? I’m not sure about it. So the although there are shades of gray, that doesn’t mean there is no black or no white. So at least the things which we know are right, we can all list things many things which we know are right and good, but we are not doing it.

And we can all list a few things which we know are bad, but we are doing it. So let’s start with that. Okay. These are 3 things which I know are good but I am not doing it. Let me start doing it.

So today, you see, our conscience is reciprocal. To the extent we listen to the consciousness, to that extent, it will guide us more and more. To the extent we stop listening to it, it will become silent. It’s like, say, first time, say, if a slot if a butcher’s son goes to the butcher’s shop and has to kill an animal, the hand will turn, no, I can’t kill. But they still kill once, twice, thrice.

And once I was in Bengal, and I was going for a program, and I saw, like, maybe a 12 year old boy, he was killing chicken as you you cut sabji. Catching the neck, cutting and throwing it away. So the conscience has been completely numbed because we have been doing it repeatedly. So basically act according to the conscience, first thing. Where we know our consciences, we all have a broad sense of right and wrong, act according to it.

Do the right and avoid the wrong. That’s first thing. Second thing is education. That means we need to study books of wisdom, study books like Bhagavad Gita, which help us to develop that moral compass. So it’s not just the Bhagavad Gita is not just telling us do this and don’t do this.

It’s not a set of simply do’s and don’ts. 1 of my friends, was he’s trying to write a book on the Bhagavad Gita. So he told me I’m writing a book called the 10 commandments of the Bhagavad Gita. So I had told him, please don’t write a book like this. He said because the Bhagavad Gita’s mood is not of giving commandments.

The Bhagavad Gita’s mood is overall of giving choices and consequences. If you do this, this will happen. If you do this, this will happen. Now you decide what you need to do. Krishna also towards the end of the Bhagavadida says, Now deliberate and decide and do as you desire.

Vimrish Sheita Dashi Sheena, 18/63, he says. So we study books of wisdom which help us to under to understand the consequences of our choices better. So, basically, the books remind us that this is white, this is black. And then shades of grey also start becoming more clarified when we study scripture. So studying scripture is very helpful.

And third is purification. Purification means that it’s in the, one of the verses in the Sanskrit literature is that janami dharmam nachame pravrutte. Janami adharmam nachame lurutte. I know this is right, but I don’t feel like doing it. I know this is wrong, but I don’t feel like doing it.

So this is a challenge which all of us have. But what happens? Purification comes by the practice of bhakti. When we connect with the all pure supreme, Krishna, then what happens? By that, the pure side within us becomes stronger, and the impure side becomes weaker.

Sometimes, if we have strong conscience and weak will power, it’s very painful. You know, to have strong conscience and strong will power is good. I know what is right and I do it. To have weak conscience and weak will power is bad, but you that’s not psychologically traumatizing. Because I don’t care also if it’s right or wrong.

I’ll just do what I want to do. I don’t want to do the right thing, and I don’t even think it is right. It’s like that. But to have strong conscience and weak will power can be quite traumatising. We feel, burdened by guilt, by remorse.

So, to avoid that, when we feel that psychological trauma, either there are 2 options. Either we if we have strong conscience and and low weak power low will power, weak will power, then what do we do? Most people just weaken their conscience, and they solve that conflict. But a healthier way to do that is to strengthen your will power. And, actually, strengthening our willpower basically means it’s not just, like, you know, just grit your teeth and do something right.

Well, that is a simplified idea of willpower. Willpower actually means that we have an we understand that our capacity to choose is shaped by the kind of impressions that are there within us. So there are some pure impressions which prompt us to do good things, and some impure impressions which prompt us to do weak weak things, bad things, so we need to strengthen the pure impressions. So when we chant, when we do japa, when we do pooja, when we come for satsang, by all this, the pure impressions within us get strengthened, and we can strengthen our conscience. Okay.

Thank you. Any other questions? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. So, Prabhuji, during the process in Bhakti, so the associations reading and attending the satsangas, so, what happens now?

After some time, attending the programs like BG programs or the Marthikesh programs, attending attending after some time, it becomes quite routine, and it becomes quite boring. And it gives an impression that, oh, actually, I’m not learning anything. I’m just spending time, but, actually, I’m not gaining anything. And the third impression, slowly, slowly detach you from that, routine or association. So how to overcome this?

Yeah. Remember that. Gentlemen. I can’t even share Mhmm. In order to see that things like this.

Keep the mind. We have continuous positive thoughts. At some points, we’ll have some negative thoughts as well coming into the mind. So how to suppress those and took only the positive side? I mean, it’s always not possible to stick, to the positive side as well.

That’s true. What what what I how do you see me? Like, when I when I started, like, Krishna conscious few years ago, I was very, very enthusiastic initially because everything seems to be new, fresh. And after some time, and I felt boring because I felt like, you know, I’m not gaining anything. Oh, I knew this is chanting.

I knew a, b, c, d. I know I’m not getting any new, and that felt boring. So how to I knew that that felt boring is not not right thing to achieve the goal. Slowly with my willpower, I practice it practice it. But how to how do you have any suggestions for any Okay.

Newcomers to go work on this Yeah. Situation? So when we practice Bhakti initially, everything seems new, and we feel attracted. But afterwards, all the practices, even the philosophy, the power points, all seem familiar and old, and then we start losing interest. So what can we do about it?

Yeah. It’s natural. When there is newness, there’s some attraction to that. But there are 2 different things. 1 is the attraction or the satisfaction which comes by learning something new.

The other is that there’s a deeper satisfaction that comes by not just learning, but learning more deeply. So you could you could say, you know, you can have breadth of learning and you can have depth of learning. So initially, when we come new, it’s the breadth. Oh, I learned new story. Oh, this new shloka.

Oh, this new point. So there’s breadth that is coming. And it’s important to have that breadth also. But after some time, what we need is depth. And depth can come when we study scripture systematically.

That and 39s why we have, say, a course in Bhakti Shastri course, we have by which we can study shastra systematically. There and 39s a lot of depth. See, when we just attend normal satsang programs, it’s understandable because that’s for also for new people, and not everybody is equally serious. So many of our normal programs will be at a particular level, which is what is needed for most But for those who want to go become more serious, there is there is opportunity for that, but we have to seek it. So one way is that just start some serious scripture study courses, and that will help us see the depth of scripture.

So so when we start going deep, then we start seeing it. There’s a there’s another kind of satisfaction that comes when you go deep into things. That’s one thing. Second thing could be that, it’s important that we start taking responsibility for the philosophy, for the practice. That means, rather than just thinking that I know this point, see if you can get a forum to start sharing it with others.

Generally, whenever we hear a class, if we have heard for a few years, I know this point, I know this point, I know this point, but when we have to speak, none of those points come to the mind. Absolutely. So even if we are not speaking formally, informally also we are talking with people, still the examples don’t click. So what happens? That means the all the story, the philosophy, all that is there, but it’s like at the back of the mind.

One of my services is writing. So in writing, they said there are 2 kinds of vocabulary. You have active vocabulary and you have dormant vocabulary. Dormant vocabulary means you know the meaning you know the meaning of that word and you know the word which conveys that meaning, But you can’t think of the word at that time. And if somebody else uses the word, yeah, that is settled.

That is what I wanted to say. Have any of you had that experience? Yes. If somebody else speaks the thought we want to speak. It’s annoying.

That was my thought. So sometimes it can be annoying. So what happens? That means the we know the word, but it’s dormant. Dormant means it’s at the back of our consciousness.

So but when we regularly use it it comes in the active vocabulary it comes ahead the same applies to philosophy also once we know it it becomes dormant It is there but when we need it, it doesn’t come to us. That’s why take responsibility to speak. Say now, if you had to give a class on association, now somebody told you today you are going to have class on association. Oh, I have heard so many classes, you may feel like that. But then if you had to give a class on association, and then you think, okay, how does the speaker speak about association?

Hey, that’s a good connection. To a large extent, absorption is not a matter of discovering the new. It is a matter of reconnecting the old. When we get absorbed in something, what does it mean? It’s a we we of course, there’s something new, but it’s also okay.

This point is connected with that point. See, if somebody is absorbed in the cricket match say, if they’re watching a cricket match, now what does it mean? Now when they’re watching a batsman playing like this, they’re immediately remembering. Oh, you know, this batsman had come at that time, and he batted like this. Oh, this ball had bowled like this.

A similar situation was there, and that happened that time, and this happened at that time. So the whole purpose of anybody can watch a cricket match. Why are commentators paid so much? Because the commentators connect what is happening over there with what has happened in the past. And that’s why they help the readers to the reader, the watchers to become more hearers to become more absorbed.

So similarly for us, we need to cultivate absorption. It’s the same point about going deep, but here I’m talking about another way to go deep. One way is to by systematic study. The another is by teaching, by taking responsibility to start sharing with others. And then even as soon as I start, at least start hearing your class and say, I heard this point.

Then you can turn it around, okay, when did I hear this point last time? What was the context? What was the what was the point of this point last time? Now is that point being said for the same purpose now or is something new being said over here? Sometimes the same point can be given to teach something else.

Same example might so the point may be the same, but the point of the point may be different. Is it clear of this point? Why am I saying this point can be different? So we need to understand that. Ultimately, if you consider music, music can be so absorbing.

But all music, if you consider the raga theory, all music is ultimately just combination of but how many combinations can be there? And how much, absorption can come through a new combination through a particular combination. So similarly, it is not that we always need new points. Even the same exist exist existing points, we put them together in a particular framework. Oh, I never saw these things in this light.

So most of you probably knew the 3 stories that I told today. But, you know, probably you learned something because they were presented in a particular framework. So that’s like music, sir. You take the same but put it in a new combination. So rather than just saying, I know this point.

Okay. When did I heard this point, and in what context am I hearing this point now? So like that, if you become more, involved in the hearing process or involved in the reading process, passive hearing means just, oh, this part is the vocal, let me hear it. But active hearing means you involve your intelligence to okay. You this point you just increase the connections.

Oh, this point is being connected this speaker is connecting this point here. Sometimes we hear a story and we think I know the story, But then the speaker draws a different lesson from the story. Hey, I didn’t think of that. So then, it’s like a we have this connection but we make a new connection. So a lot of absorption comes by discovering new connections.

So if you do these things, study systematically, join a systematic study course, take the responsibility for teaching and whenever you hear a familiar point, don’t just dismiss, ‘I know this but when did I know this? When I had heard it last time?’ That way, you can foster new connections and become more absorbed. Okay? Thank you. Now regarding your question regarding your question, about, say, we have positive thoughts, but occasional negative thoughts come up.

What do we do at that time? In general, it’s, impossible to always have positive or pure thoughts. The world is a impure place, and negativity and impurity will come because of that. But the important thing is what do we do in response to that. I as mentioned in the introduction, I write on the Bhagavad Gita every day at the website called githadaily.com.

So I try to present the Bhagavad Gita’s wisdom in concise quotes. So based on 523 in the Bhagavad Gita, I had written a quote that temptation will temptation will come. We don’t have to welcome. No. But it is there’s a difference between temptation coming and we welcome.

No. So we all will get tempted, but do I do I welcome that? Do I expand that? Or okay. But I’m not interested in this.

Now now it’s it’s not easy, but at least we know. So temptation that’s the first point, that at least we need to differentiate. Just because temptation has come doesn’t mean I have to indulge in it. I can’t ex demand that temptation not come at all because the world is a place of temptation. But what can we do?

1st, we understand that I just because it has come doesn’t mean I have to say yes. Then next thing is temptations. The Bhagavatam says that temptations come like waves. In an ocean, if, say, we are fall in the ocean, if waves are coming, it’s almost impossible to fight the waves. I’ll push the view back.

I can’t do that. When a view comes, it’ll sweep us away. But if you don’t want to be swept away, there is a way. That is find an anchor to hold on to. Anchor is a heavy object, which the wave cannot move.

So, now, when the wave hits us, holding on to the anchor will also be difficult. But, comparatively speaking, the chances of fighting against the wave and holding the wave back are almost negligible for us. But the chances of holding on to the anchor are much higher. The same strength if we exert in trying to fight the wave and the same strength we exert in trying to hold out the anchor, the chances of we being saved are much higher. So we have to find out what are the best anchors for us.

The holy name of Krishna is an anchor. Whenever any desires come up, instead of dwelling on those desires, just start chanting the holy names. Studying scripture or hearing classes or not just hearing, but noting down some striking point that we are working, keeping them ready with us so so that we can do good. Oh, yeah. This is right.

And then that illumines us. So we have to find out our anchors. Sometimes it might just be good spiritual music, some nice kirtans. We feel tempted. We feel agitated.

But then we hear the kirtans. We start feeling calm. So then we can’t we can’t drive out the negativity. But even in the presence of negativity, we can create room for positivity. And once we create that room for positivity, gradually the positivity can expand and once the positivity expands, then the negativity starts going out.

So, by finding out our anchors and holding on to the anchors, and even if the negativity come like comes like waves, we won’t be swept away by it. K. Thank you. Yes. So, in fact, one thing is the peer pressure that we talk about, very similar to what, I mean, people who are, you know, 5 point 8 and so that I, you know, I’m able to, you know, get the right adversity.

But we are we have been a world where, you know, I am in a world where there are a lot of gadgets. Everybody has a gadget. Everybody has this. Everybody has that. I am now in a position either I feel deprived if I don’t have it, or I feel the fear of being odd if I don’t have it.

How do I find that peer pressure? Okay. So if our gadgets distract us, but if we if we have the gadgets, then we will become like odd person out. And the peer pressure will be there for us. So we can’t avoid that.

Yeah. It’s not a matter of this is practicing spiritual life doesn’t mean that we have to go to extremes. There can be balanced ways of doing things. For example, device distraction is not just a concern for spiritualists. It’s a concern for everyone.

Now there are so many apps that are developed to regulate screen time for kids. There are from computer. There are parent control app parent control apps. And there there are many, like, successful people even in Silicon Valley who don’t use social media so much. There are some recently I forget the name.

The prominent Hollywood star, Hollywood hero who doesn’t have a Facebook account. So now I’m not saying that we can’t do that, but I’m saying that this concern is there for everyone, everybody is dealing with it. So it is possible to be regulated. And that basically means that we try to create as much structure as possible in our life. What does that mean?

That means that structure means, okay, this is the time when I’ll do this, this is the time when I’ll do this. We don’t want to be imprisoned by our structure, but we want to be protected by our structure. Say, if it’s Sunday, and whole day I have nothing to do, and then maybe I take up my phone, just look at Facebook or look at YouTube, I might spend 6 hours on it. But if I have something to do, okay, now I have to do this work, I have to meet this person, I have to do this, then what will happen? The more the more structure we have, the less rupture our mind can cause.

And social media is nothing but our mind extended by technology. Like, our mind, others’ mind, all minds have come together in the form of social media. So now just as we need our mind, we can’t we can’t think without our mind, but sometimes we can’t think because of our mind. It works both ways. We the mind is a tool for thinking, but the mind starts getting thinking of everything else except what it is meant to think about.

Or sometimes the mind starts thinking, overthinking. So just as we need the mind, similar in today’s world, we need we need social media, we need Internet, we need devices, but we need regulation. Generally, what I find helpful, and I have told others, I’ve given given talks also on this, broadly three things I talk about. Be purposeful in browsing. That means don’t just think that browsing is something which I’ll do when I get bored.

And then it’ll be succazily purposeful. Okay? I want to visit this website. I want to look at this app. I want to look at this.

Be purposeful. Be clear why we are going on the Internet. The second is be regulated. Okay. 15 minutes, half an hour.

Sometimes we might have to spend an hour or 2 also, but whatever it is, plan out. Now we may say, but no, sometimes something interesting comes up and we would like to watch that. Yeah. Then third thing is be ready to differ. Don’t have to say no, but not now.

Right now, I had planned 15 minutes, look 15 minutes. Hey. This video looks very interesting. I wanna see it. Yeah.

It might be useful also. You know? It’s not that everything on social media is bad. There’s a lot of good stuff also available. I gave a class once on Internet in the three modes.

Even on Internet, there is a lot of goodness also available. A lot of knowledge available, a lot of spirituality is also available there. But a lot of other distractions also there. So be ready to differ. That means, see when something pops up in front of us, it’s very difficult for us to discern.

Should I watch it or not watch it? The the the the the urge to discover the the hope of discovering something new that is so strong, let me just watch it. And you might spend hours, so be ready to differ. Yes. This looks interesting.

I’ll go I may I’ll watch it later. And maybe you decide after 6 hours, after one day, or maybe have a weekend when you decide I’m going to watch this. And by that time, what will happen? That urge for newness will have gone down. And then you can evaluate based on merit.

Is this really required for me to see? And then we can evaluate. So, basically, purposefulness be purposeful, be time bound, and be ready to differ. If you do these three things, relatively speaking, it is possible to, to balance our engagement with social media and technology. Okay?

Thank you. Question 1. Mhmm. So in the process of, Bhakti, sometimes, like, while choosing association, so having a determination in the process might, appear rude to, like, old friends or even family. So how do we deal with that?

How do what to do in such a Yeah. Can you give an example? Like suppose, like, if it’s a family, then they have different, ways of, doing things. Like, they want to enjoy something else, and we want to do something else, like, spiritually or something. So it would be a Okay.

Conflict of interest there and how Okay. Yeah. For example, eating, onion garlic or knowledge. For example, we come from a background on knowledge. Even now, they have been disappointed that I have given up knowledge.

So this is a simple example, but, in the spiritual life, many things come up so often. Okay. Be strong and not get, you know, sad or disturbing. Yeah. Okay.

And the other thing is you have the same tantric. Like, when you come to the bhakti moksha and Krishna conscious, initially, you are you are, subtle by, you are you are within this friend circle. So when you become a Krishna conscious member, slowly, you you are connected with your whole friends through habits. When you come to the Krishna conscious, it is a lifestyle change. So, your habits change, the and your consciousness change.

And it is difficult for this person to go and click into the same subconsciousness, and there’s a little bit conflict. And that’s what how to be Yeah. Okay. So when if you want to be strict in practicing bhakti, we have to stop doing some things which we were doing with our family members or old friends, and that can offend them. So how can we be strict without without offending or hurting others?

Yeah. We need to go beyond black and white. Sometimes we say this is spiritual, this is material. It’s true that kind of classification is true, but that is not complete. Within the material, also there is sattva, rajas, and tamas, or we could call it as pro devotional, non devotional, and anti devotional.

Sometimes when you lump everything together, then people start feeling that you don’t do any of the things that I’m doing. And then it creates a big rupture. But the process of bhakti does require us to some extent to make some hard choices. But we don’t have to make the choices hard unnecessarily. Let’s do different things.

That means, say, I would say with respect to meat eating, we need to be strong. That is something which, actually, we don’t have to be even religious to to recognize that meat eating are not be not so good. So many people who are becoming vegan now. So many people simply because of maybe just emotional sensitivity, they say I’ll not eat meat. That’s like us we could say that is like a core principle for us.

So within the practices of bhakti also, there are core principles, and there are auxiliary principles. So we don’t have to consider everyone, everything to be just as equally important. So having said that, we can as I said, that’s pro devotional, non devotional, anti devotional. So if something is anti devotional, be firm about saying no to it. But if something is pro devotional, something is non dev pro devotional means if somebody just wants to talk about music.

Now they may be talking about music, and they may talk about Bollywood songs and these songs, but you know, if not just somebody’s talking about music, but let’s talk about music in a little deeper sense, you know, this instrument is played this way, that is played that way, then we can also learn something from that. They may not be directly talking about learning it for Krishna, but it’s it’s favorable to devotion. We can learn something from it. Maybe they are singing a Bollywood movie tune, but we learn that tune and we can use it in just giving a random example over here. But there are things that are pro devotional.

Although they are not doing it in a devotional way, but they are useful for devotion. Some things are non devotional. Say, if some people want to talk about sports or politics. Now some for some people, sports and politics can be like a obsession when they keep talking all the time. But for some people, then they can just be like a icebreaker.

You know. If 2 people meet, then what do you talk? If somebody is a devotee and somebody is not a devotee, then there is no common substance to talk also. But if people start feeling that, if we have something which are non devotional, but they’re not anti devotional, then talking a little bit about that, that’s not a big problem. So, I was talking with a senior sanyasi leader in our moment.

He said that after many years, his mother when he was he himself was, like, in sixties. His mother, became very sick. He was diagnosed with cancer. But it was not a fast acting cancer. It was slow cancer.

But his mother became a little more, spiritually oriented because of that. Then he connect he connected with her, and then they start meeting and talking. But then he said that when, you know, I will maybe, I would show her some Hari Krishna movies, maybe Acharya or others. She would watch it because she loved me. But after that, we would have nothing to talk because this is like so directly spiritual movies.

She says then he he told me that I talk with some of my godbrothers, other sanyasis, and then he said we selected some like wholesome western movies. See there are movies also of different kinds. Some are like inspirational stories. Some are just like bang bang violence. Some are sexuality.

So some movies we uplifting movies which talk about some moral values. And these movies, we started discussing. And then we couldn’t discuss a lot of things. And then slowly, in that discussion, I started inserting Krishna conscious themes. So he says, now we have a very good relationship, and now when actually, when she passed away, you know, he was there and she was chanting, he was there chanting for her.

And then he said that couldn’t have happened if I had not started by extending myself. So now I’m not recommending that everybody watch movies just to develop relationships. No. We can rationalize anything for anything. But I’m saying that we sometimes need to be a little broader in our vision.

That means reject. This is spiritual. This is material. I’m going to reject everything material. No.

In material also, you use we use our intelligence to classify. And that is just pro devotional, non devotional. Sometimes if you have to do a few things like that, that’s okay. See, there are even in standards, there are levels. That means, say we can say the pure prasadam is what?

Food that is is harvested by devotees, food that is irrigated is is transported by devotees, food that is cooked by devotees, food that is offered by devotees, food that is honored by devotees. That could that could the highest standard. And then we could have also food that is not meet, that is offered to Krishna and taken. So all these are standards. Now you could say a higher standard is better, which is true but then everything is within the realm of acceptability.

But somebody says meat, that is not acceptable. So the the within what is the what is the what is acceptable, there can be a spectrum. And at different times, we may situate ours in the different places within that spectrum. So we have to consider that not only do I want to be Krishna conscious, but I also want to act in a way that attracts others to Krishna consciousness. Not that it alienates others.

If my strictness makes people’s alarm and scared, You know, if I become a devotee, I have to become like this person. Then we we say, I’m so strict, but actually we are doing disservice. And so I was with an from I was with the Solange Viraj Maharaj. He’s a very prominent, very senior disciple of Prabhupada. So he was telling me about how Prabhupada was, was practical.

Once the devotees had gone to somebody’s house to take food, and at that time, they had cooked food with onion garlic. And they were all sitting and taking, and one of Prabhupada’s disciples said, Prabhupada, there’s onion over here. Prabhupada looked at him and said, there’s no onion in this. And then he said, no, Prabhupada. There’s onion in this.

There is no onion in this. And then that that is the authority. He actually took out some onion and showed it to Prabhupada. See, there is onion. And Prabhupada looked straight at him.

There is no onion in this. And then Prabhupada looked almost angry, and he became silent after that. And then they all took that food. And after that, when they were going back, Prabhupada said to the devotees that, you know, for a religious family, if a sadhu comes to your house and then rejects the food, it is like a considered to be a disaster. That is our mistake that we didn’t tell them in advance that and we didn’t tell emphatically that we don’t take garlic.

So if they have cooked, they have cooked with some service attitude, some devotion. So as Krishna consciousness is not just about ticking some boxes about how many rules we are following. It is about acting in a way that maintains our Krishna consciousness and also maintains attracts enhances other Krishna consciousness. So, again, I’m not recommending eating food with only garlic. That’s not the point over here.

The point I’m making simply is that we shouldn’t think that Krishna consciousness is only about strictly following rules. It is also about acting in a way that attracts others to Krishna consciousness. So, we need to be sensitive. If certain things are very important for people, then we may do those things, just because we don’t want to disrupt the society. Krishna says that don’t disrupt the minds of ignorant people.

So even if somebody is doing something which is not exactly the way we do things, and we we may not do it that way. But, okay, go along and do it with them. And if that maintains the peace in the family so if we do something for a for a few minutes, they they are performing some pooja, and that’s a family pooja that is happening, and we go and do that pooja. And then we are in a different country. We are in a different place.

And the remaining 3 64 days, maybe the remaining 3 64 days and 23 hours, we can peacefully practice Krishna consciousness. Then for that 1 hour, doing something which is not anti devotional, it will just be non devotional, but then it’s okay. Just do it and focus on continuing Krishna consciousness properly. But if for that 1 hour see, I will not do this. I remember one devotee, and he was he just had become a devotee, and all over the world, there is something called as the zeal of the new convert.

If somebody is newly taken or something, they are, like, fanatical about it. So what happened was that in their family, they would worship some dhyota, and then he had gone home. And normally, then at the puja, there was prasad. So now he thought that I’ll take only Krishna prasad, not duta prasad. So what he did, they gave him prasad.

He took it. He kept it in his mouth, and then he went out, and he spit it out into dustbin. And one of the relatives saw it. And it was like a thunder after that. So, you know, okay.

If most of their life, most of the days, most of your meals are prasad, if one hand for for most Hindus, prasad is not a full meal. It’s just one something which you take in your hand. Isn’t it? So, you know, if you take one handful like that and that maintains the the the peace on the family, then what is the big deal? We have to be clear about what are central principles and what are not central principles.

I’m not saying not central and not important, but in the relative hierarchy. Now to if to follow if to follow strict small principle, I become so strict that then it causes so many disturb disturbance. So, hey, then our whole family is angry, and then there are quarrels, and then you’re chanting 16 rounds, and not one round you are hearing. Not 1 mantra you’re hearing because your mind is so agitated. Well, keep the mind peaceful so that you can focus on bhakti.

So we have to be balanced, and balanced means understanding what is more important, what is non negotiable and what can be negotiated. Okay? Thank you. Thank you very much. Prashev, Haribo.

Haribo. Haribol has some new books done, Ramayanam and Git.